The strength of Mel and Susan Rubin's partnership cannot always save that of the clients for whom they mediate. But sometimes it can and does.

If not, it is a sure bet that civil attorney Mel and family therapist Susan offer fair, sound, compassionate mediation for many businesses and marriages on the brink of break up.

The Rubins, each of whom has had a private practice for a good couple of decades, offer an out-of-court option for those who want to end their legal contracts peaceably.

This includes business partners, landlords and tenants, married couples, families members disputing a deceased's will, people involved in car accidents and property buyers and sellers. What results is a legally binding document that has as much weight as one that was obtained in court.

"You can use mediation for any two people who have a conflict and want to discuss it to come to resolution," explained Susan, former director of a women's counseling center and current co-director at the Miami Counseling and Resource Center.

Isn't it ironic?

The Rubins can actually thank the field of mediation for their marriage. Not because theirs was on the rocks but because they first met after Susan got her mediation training in 1981 and knocked on this attorney named Mel Rubin's door to pitch the idea to him.

"He very nicely told me I was nuts," Susan recalled with a playful, told-ya-so kind of look.

Not three years later, the couple was married. But they didn't begin working together on mediation cases until Mel was hired for a divorce case in which the husband was stricken with an anxiety attack right in the office.

The husband of a therapist, Mel knew to buzz down to Susan's office. Her partner, Key resident Paula Levine, was available to work out the kink and afterward, both Rubins realized the value of their respective professions--his quick lawyer's wit and her therapeutic nurturing--in a mediation practice.

With its roots in ancient cultures such as China, mediation is not an invention of the late 20th century. What rabbis, priests and elders have long been to yesterday's villages, mediators are to modern urbanized culture.

"In the old days," Mel said, "families had mediation because families were together and they went to the grandfather. Mediation is nothing new. It's a continuum of people using someone else to get them out of a mess."

The field of mediation has recently grown from completely informal, sometimes subjective third party participation to formal training and even certification from the Florida Supreme Court for mediators who facilitate in the courts.

With the help of the Florida legislature, mediation is now a required option in the state judicial system as well as a field on its way to professional status. "Mediation has become a de facto requirement because it has proven itself to be so effective that most, if not all, judges do require it before a matter is set down for final hearing or trial," Mel said.

Mel and Susan are not only certified mediators but also past presidents of the Florida Association of Professional Family Mediators. In addition, Mel, a court-approved trainer who conducts three or four trainings each year for family and civil mediators, has instructed everyone from disheartened lawyers and retired judges to clergymen and psychologists from all over the world.

Power to the people

The Rubins contend that the most advantageous aspect of mediation is personal power. Rather than a judge mandating the fate of the individuals' finances, children and future business dealings, both parties negotiate directly with one another in the presence of a third party to determine their outcome. And all homework is done by the clients, not attorneys who work by the billable hour.

"The concept of empowerment," explained Mel, who has litigated his share of divorces, "is that people can select whoever they want to help them as opposed to the court system, where by blind file you get assigned a judge who you know nothing about but whose decisions will affect the rest of your life and the rest of your children's lives."

Susan agreed. "I always tell people, 'The nice thing about mediation is, you've hired me for my expertise, but the final decisions are yours.'"

Once the parties agree on the terms of the mediation, the Rubins draw up a memorandum of understanding, which summarizes the agreement. The Rubins encourage their clients to go over the memorandum carefully with accountants, attorneys, real estate appraisers and any other relevant party before finalizing the document.

"We want them to feel they've had every opportunity to review it," Mel explained.

Sometimes the parties do not come to resolution, such as the zoning issue between the Miami Seaquarium and the Village of Key Biscayne, which Mel mediated years ago. The parties found no common ground and the case is still tied up in the court system.

But, Mel said, parties in the process of a mediation often do come up with solutions themselves. He said this is ideal because the individuals will more likely be able to deal with one another without a third party in the future.

And every once in awhile, the parties decide, after courageously mucking through their swamp of disagreement, that they don't want to terminate their partnership after all.

In fact, some parties approach the Rubins for pre-nuptial or early business agreements to prevent court cases later. Many of these agreements include a clause requiring that if there is a future conflict, the parties seek the help of a mediator before going through the judiciary.

This brand of peaceable conflict resolution has very much impacted the tone of Mel's legal practice. "I find the clientele that comes to me now is more willing to talk than the client that comes and says, 'I want you to kill the bastard.'

"It's a very helpful, very satisfying way to make a living...You don't have to go in the courthouse and beat up people."

Both Mel and Susan say mediation is a long-awaited balm for such bruisings, a salve for the war wounds of an overly litigious society. "People are afraid to be their own advocates and stand up for themselves," Susan explained. "When something happens people always say, 'Did you get a lawyer?'"

Perhaps someday they will ask, "Did you get a mediator?"